Monday, January 2, 2012

Meant to Be

Ihave been contemplating the concept of "it's meant to be" for several weeks now in relation to my thus far fruitless job search. In lots of small ways, it becomes clearer each day that for some reason, right now, I am not meant to have gainful employment.

Now I'm not saying I have an inkling why this should be so.

I don't.

All I am saying is that I am seeing a pattern to the way my job seek is transpiring that doesn't feel like coincidence. In fact, it seems very much as if someone (Someone!) is taking a highlighter pen and running it across similar incidents that recur with regularity during my job-hunt as if to say, "Look! See this? And this? It's the same thing happening again. Are you getting this?"

Yup. I'm seeing signs.

The signs don't outline any sort of reason for my unemployment and that's okay. It just feels like the sort of situation that is going to work out for the best. The end of the story will not be revealed until the end of the story, if at all.

But that's okay, too.

You see, the signs are enough for me. I can feel that someone (Someone!) who is not me, is directing things. That knowledge has tremendous power. If I have a desperate moment of anguish over my lack of employment, I remember that I am not in charge and that everything is for the best. It helps a lot, this firm knowledge I have of things being outside of my control. 

That is saying a lot considering I'm a control freak. But you see, it is just so clear that in this particular instance, this is on HIS to-do list, and not on MINE.

Of course, it goes without saying that I must continue to pursue every possible avenue of employment. From my end, I have to keep up the pressure and never give up. But it does feel good to know that I'm not just a gerbil on a wheel. The thought that I do not have ultimate control of what happens next gives me hope and helps me get through each day, one day at a time.

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